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Truth
This night I think Ive truly gone insane I know not where my emotions spring from for
I am filled with sadness, or maybe its truly joy for getting the truth off of my conciseness finally. If it be that which
I last said I fear that my writing may end soon for I can easily tell the truth more and can worry less about what would happen
should my true feeling be discovered by others.
Sleepless Suffering
Throughout my life Ive given others pain and sorrow I thought I wouldnt feel their pain
I thought I was immune to it I knew not that it was stronger then I, for only a short while ago have a begun to feel the pains
of my actions now I wish I could undo the evil and make my nights more sleep filled then sleepless.
Alone but with tears
I dont think I can sleep this night though I most likely shall for my mind is traveling
upon many a though only to leave one and to go to the next I second later only to return upon it later, but I will sleep this
night Im sure I will fall to sleep alone with my tears and fears.
Split Journey
This world is totally messed up weve got the teachers and the preachers leading the sinners
on their journey, the corrupt and just alike in the journey all to be damned in the end with only a blessed few to be saved.
The Jail that is School
I wish to escape this time or this horrid place. Perhaps I could burrow out of this hellish
jail, or fly out over its captive gates, or perhaps it shall just have to be endured. Whatever it must be I pray that it will
be quick for to me this is truly hell.
Breakable Power
My mind is spinning or maybe its just my head. My eyes droop with an artificial tiredness
my body has a minor high. Tell me why someone tell me why, Jesus tell me why. Every time my mind fades I wake up in my bed.
Every time I lose my mind I wander aimlessly throughout the corridors of my hell. My mind is twisting reality to bad it cannot
last. My mind says I need to sleep I need to rest, Im afraid to fall asleep here the demons in my hell are great and number
and might try to choke my neck. My mind is spinning though my write is straight and true. The patterns on the floor perplex
my mind the spinning and the designs are easily enough to impress this light of mind. Has your world ever been spinning but
your thoughts so clear? Their plan was so simple let in a paradox most cruel and absurd. They flew their plans into the towers
and into the wall of a pentagon. Their plan was not for the lacking of faith but those truly devoted to there cause. I think
it was all a ploy though disastrous and problematic. I think it was there plan to make the money flow to their pockets, I
think they never meant for this to be so tragic. Though this event was tragic we needed this to happen, Americans have long
thought that their country was invincible unable to be struck. Those who knew this could happen were truly blessed for they
knew the possibilities for this predestined date.
Lost
I saw my dream I saw my hope I saw my desire, they came from one name that is Amber. I
was looking for death but she gave me life. She killed some of my pain taking some upon herself just wanting to keep me alive.
My spirit wanted to flee but she made it stay. I love amber she loves me the love is marvelous her love is amazingly great.
We need to meet again we need to have a little fun again. I lost my mind I need to find it oh where did it go off to, my mind
is week filled only with words of poetry and love, hate and death oh where did my mind go I need to find its strength once
again.
Seeing the Fault in Failure
I fail, I fail daily I fail every hour every minute every second. Seeing myself fail,
seeing my dreams just disappear where is my hope where, is my ability to succeed.
You are the one you are my prayer you saved my life and I barely even cared, all could of ended the world
would have won the sins of my mind would have overcome. I see your face I see your love I want to see that sweet love again
come hug me with your love giving me strength to carry on. Punish me, hate me, torture me but what energy you do give me your
love give me that hope that change love me make me love you how can you love me I want to die its a battle no one can win
but you turned the tides you made my battle winnable you got the power you can help me with your love. You love me though
I falter and stumble you have gone through it you stopped it you can help me you helped me Im better or maybe not, my mind
drifts back to the old fears and troubles. I have failed not you dont try to appeal to my better nature for it has long since
left me never to return. I must find it or be gone enter a world of trouble and of pain how can this last. The troubles tear
my heart, my mind, and my soul right in two, but here you are to mend my soul to help my mind to help my heart heal. You make
me well my wounds are mended. Your inspiration touching my heart whish is no longer stone it has changed help it not to come
to shameshame has come but it will not endure I see its end its coming near all that is needed to end it is for you to hold
me near. You hold me close you hold me near my troubles disappear. You let go for only a fraction of a moment you disappear
the pain returns along with the fears hold me near I cant handle this pain, you quickly take hold of me thee pain diminishes
quickly my mind and strength return and once again all my troubles disappear.
Death is in my hands nothing could stop it I could make it happen at this moment deaths bite is cold and hard I feel its
coldness pressing upon my skin it wants to kill me it wants me to kill myself. What can I do its begging me to do this silly
and dumb act I know what I can do I can throw it out of my mind to be forever banished from me. I threw it away it came right
back it flew right past me it flew right back into my mind....(was written when deeply depressed)
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